Sunday, December 22, 2013

THE ORIGIN OF SWAG (feel free to share)




I rolled over this morning and lifted my head off of my pillow in search of a new cold spot, at the same moment Ryan began to stretch, and his elbow and my nose met in a crash.  Sweet sounds of Sunday morning played in the background, compliments of Baton Rouge, LA and Jimmy Swaggart Ministries (SBN Live).    

A combination of things kept me from immediately searching for the remote and turning on the news: 1) my eyes were watering and I thought my brain may have been impaled by my nose 2) “Silent Night” was playing and what kind of Grinch turns that off 3 days before Christmas?, and 3) Ryan seemed into it.  (The Gospel music really was beautiful).

So, by default, SBN Live provided us with a wake up call. 

SBN, otherwise known as SonLife Broadcasting Network, is broadcasted all over the world.  Prior to launching SBN to the world wide web, Swaggart and wife were bringing in around $600,000 a year + perks from his ministry.  (LET ME REITERATE THAT SALARY IS BEFORE LAUNCHING SBN, late 80s/early 90s)  (CNN)  “Even if [the Swaggart’s] have had NO salary increase [since], the current dollar value of that salary would be around $880,000 annually plus perks.  (keep on tithing people)

Post-Swaggart's 80s Scandals, (you know you remember- when he got caught with a prostitute in his JAGUAR, shortly after his public adultery confession to his poor wife and return to preaching) CNN did a little researching into Jimmy’s finances.  Evidently, Swaggart’s ministries had been funded in part by “questionable real estate transactions and tax exempt donations from hoodwinked donors” (CNN Impact Investigation).  CNN discovered from 1992-1996 over half of the ministry’s income was gained through real estate and rental income, roughly 27 million out of a total of 54 million.   (if you're still interested in his financial affairs- Google Jimmy's involvement with the estate of Zoe Vance- you'll think twice about letting your rich grandma attend church by herself; Jimmy is a real Peach) 



Isn’t that a hoot? He doesn’t have to pay property taxes and gets to lease out properties to make more money, (Sarah Palin voice inserted here) God Bless America and the Separation of Church and State… I would love to digress here and explain how that really worked out because believe it or not CHURCHES USED TO PAY JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE and the separation had way more to do with keeping church leaders OUT of the political sphere, but that’s for another time.  (This is also why I personally believe churches should be paying property taxes AGAIN…  one of these days I’ll blog on the Drug Cartel’s use of “church exemptions” in property taxes and really blow your mind)

So, you may be wondering by now, what is Whitney doing this morning?  Where did this all come from? 

This is how it happened: 

As the “new media members” names were being read, Location first, then name (because let’s face it Jimmy’s global reach is more important than the person who is being reached), I said to Ryan “You know I’m happy they are sharing the word of God, but something about this bothers me.  There is a lot of money being made here.”

Interestingly enough the “net worth” of SBN is anything but easy to locate on the world wide web.  (Definitional terms are coming to mind: Synergy, Transparency, Honesty, Integrity).  Let me be perfectly clear on something, I am not against companies or website that make a lot of money.  I love money.  There are a lot of fun things you can do with it, and more importantly there are so many LOVING and HELPFUL things you can do with it. 

What I have a problem with is this:  JSM- JIMMY SWAGGART MINISTERIES- bringing in media members from all over the world (today there were 103- one ALL THE WAY from Pakistan – aka some white dude out there passing out bibles probably).  Why is it that a man, who gets caught with his pants around his ankles in his Jaguar with a prostitute, is so easily forgiven that we allow him to “share the word of God” in his OWN F*CKING NAME- making millions of dollars off of the people he is “helping”? (Here- I’m not just talking about tithing- I’m talking about advertisement endorsements and the profits from his “catalogue” and whatever other bullshit adventures he is making money off of)

Today, one of the messages ridiculed young people for “smoking pot” and thinking it makes them closer to God.  Well I have news for Mr. Swag-

Smoking pot, getting a little hungry and a little paranoid, relaxing a little, laughing with friends, letting go of some inhibitions to have  REAL conversations with other human beings—Yea I feel closer to God doing that than I can only IMAGINE I would feel in my Jaguar (probably purchased by the tithes of my followers) getting a blow job (also possibly paid for by tithing). 

Now I know, critics of what I have to say will point out the charity work behind SBN and JSM and to them I say Touché.  

I also would like to point out (based on the assumption that Jimmy is a Jaguar-driving-man) that $75,000 spent on a Luxury Sports Car could sponsor 2,142 children on www.worldvision.org providing clean water, nutritious food, health care, education, etc. 

Philosophers from millennia ago knew all about this sort of thing, these self-serving leaders who DO NOT put the GOOD OF ALL before what is good for the self.  If we want to be led by people who have true and good character we will choose to be led by those who lead from duty not desire. 



Fortunately, my God is BIGGER THAN JIMMY SWAGGART, and will look right past his horse shit to appreciate the souls of those who have turned to JSM in search of the truth, in search of the Lord.  My God WILL love those who have been fooled by this man and his money. 

But I WILL NOT BE FOOLED and I hope that you aren’t either. 

I’m not asking for Swaggart’s beheading nor the dismantling of SBN.   But, how about a little transparency?  How about a little more HONESTY AND INTEGRITY ?

If SBN and JSM want to get on tv and tell people about sinning, they could at least do us the courtesy of being up-front.  (a public confession that you  cheated on your wife in the 80s doesn’t mean anything when you get caught just a few years later with prostitutes Jimmy).   I could care less where the man’s pants end up…  But for Christ’s sake (meant literally, not as “cursing”), start telling the truth about where all the money your making is coming from AND WHERE IT IS ENDING UP…

and by the way- he screws, he lies, he cheats, he drives fancy cars, and he makes billions off of people who are too stupid to know what is really going on.  YUP I FOUND THE SOURCE OF “SWAG”- all Jimmy Swaggart needs to do now is punch his wife in the face (or his gf/prostitute) and we will have another Chris Brown on our hands. 

You know, at least when Ryan accidentally elbows me in the face, I KNOW HE LOVES ME and didn’t mean any harm by it.  Jimmy Swaggart, on the other hand, continues to drop bows, and I can assure you it’s out of self-LOVE and he CARES NOT what anybody thinks about it (just ask FRANCIS, his wife).  No thump on a bible can mask the thunderous BOOM of self-love…. Isn’t that right Pakistan man?    

“No one can serve two masters, for either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to one and despise the other.  You CANNOT serve God and money.”  Matthew 6:24

Seek the TRUTH and the Light :)  

Namaste friends,    

Whitney


PS.  Thanks Jimmy- investigating your hypocrisy this morning has helped me feel closer to God.  Almost, as much as a joint would have ----  ALMOST ;)  (insert jest/sarcasm here)  

Sources: 
(I invite and welcome challenges to my sources, I dislike bad journalism just as much as the next person and will happily debunk a story that is false- even if it is my own)
Mike Siegel (Media and Communication Expert see www.mikesiegel.com)
www.CNN.com
www.People.com
www.digitaljournal.com

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